Goopy Husbands
a beginners guide
How great is man in all his cave-man-ness.
Certainly a harrowing sentiment given the times we live in, and despite the endless and more often times deserved berating on the newly second sex these days, a lighter side of love might still be shed on the men who secretly steal our eye cream. Shall we not take a moment to praise the evolution (and the subsequent space thus given for our own weirdness to shine) of the closeted goopy husband.
While not a fresh label amongst quizzes and vids asking “how goopy are you”, the goopy husband ignores all branding, social or otherwise, that might give public mention to his affinity for PAI’s Rose Hip Oil or the ever growing benefit of the jade roller tucked discreetly in the back of the freezer drawer. His affections know no price of course when you realize your $185 bottle of Vintner’s Daughter is mysteriously draining before your eyes or the Neocutis eye cream cannot be pumped any further. Confrontation meets denial but truth is often found in his ever glowy-yet-manly morning dew. You’ve led by example and yet, all actions have consequences. Once your goopy man has taken note of your own personal glow-up, the train of query will have officially left the station.
The beauty of course is that in this shared self-care, the side eye looks that so often accompanied the shopping bags from CAP Beauty and SpaceNK might now be met with softer inquiries that have the slightest touch of curiosity. “Where do we use / try / put this?” is suddenly a common phrase that flanks exploration and assessment. Encouragement is necessary but must be administered in doses…. No man responds well when his partner suspects his masculinity is waning. Face masks with netflix, acceptable… an elaborate multi-step bronzer scheme is another slippery slope. These are still men that will fix a leaky pipe in the house and hold your door chivalrously with ease, but in their ruggedness a new sensibility flag can fly with freedom, with just the right seeds planted and watered. Celery juice? He’s in. Gua-sha facial massage? What’s the harm. (Rather questionable) colonics in Bali?… well you’ve found the one, he’s a keeper.
Foreo Luna for Men
For the deep clean after a day on the motorcyle.
No bothersome refills or brusheahds required | 129 €
Dr. Sam’s Flawless Cleanser
So unfussy & effective, he’ll soon forget all about your Tata | £16
Deviant Facial Oil
Synergistic plant oils give comfort to even the most stressed out skin; ultra absorbant | 39 €